Child Custody and Committed Intimate Relationships: What Washington State Law Says

As a parent, your child’s well-being is one of your highest priorities. Whether you are married to your child’s other parent, cohabitating with the other parent, in a different relationship with a new partner, or raising your child on your own, you likely are deeply invested in supporting your child and helping them thrive. When married parents make the decision to end their relationship and pursue a divorce in Washington state, they will need to make a series of important decisions as they untangle their lives from one another. For instance, they will need to determine an equitable division of property and discuss whether spousal maintenance is appropriate. Additionally, divorcing parents will need to establish a parenting plan, which addresses child custody arrangements, visitation schedules, and other details about how the separated parents will take active roles in raising the children. Child custody discussions can become tense and emotional, escalating into serious legal disputes in some cases. While some parents may be able to work through these disagreements and create a parenting plan that works for both of them, others may need to take the matter to arbitration or litigation for a third party to establish a parenting plan that protects the child’s best interests. Regardless of the path the divorce takes, it’s often helpful to have a seasoned and knowledgeable Seattle family law attorney by your side to answer your questions, address your concerns, and support you at every step of the process. 

So, what about child custody issues for non-married parents in Washington state? Are child custody laws for unmarried couples in Washington different from those of married couples? Generally speaking, unmarried parents who separate before or after the birth of a child still have the same legal rights and responsibilities as married parents when it comes to child custody, visitation, and child support matters. However, the path to protecting and exercising these rights may look slightly different for unmarried parents or those in a committed intimate relationship. This post will explore some of the key considerations for parents in committed intimate relationships who are facing child custody and parenting plan issues. 

What Counts as a Committed Intimate Relationship in Washington State?

First, it’s worth taking some time to define the term “committed intimate relationship” and what it means for Washington’s child custody laws. Under RCW 26.60.010, “The public has an interest in providing a legal framework for such mutually supportive relationships, whether the partners are of the same or different sexes, and irrespective of their sexual orientation.” In other words, Washington state law recognizes that those in committed and devoted partnerships should have similar rights to those who are married, so that both parties have some protections when the relationship ends. While there is no one, all-encompassing definition of what constitutes a committed intimate relationship in Washington, the court will look at certain factors that indicate the presence of such a relationship in the event of the couple’s separation. Below are a few of these factors that can be used to evaluate the commitment and intent of the couple and inform the court’s decisions.

The Duration of the Relationship

The court will assess the length of the relationship to determine the strength of the commitment. Generally speaking, longer relationships attest to the existence of a committed intimate relationship, as partners who have cohabitation together for many years usually share a substantial commitment. Although there is no minimum requirement for how long a relationship should last before it is considered a committed intimate relationship, most partners in a committed intimate relationship live together for at least three years.

The Nature of the Relationship

In order for a relationship to be considered a committed intimate relationship, the couple usually needs to demonstrate that they resided with each other and shared a similar vision for the partnership. Couples that took similar steps to those in a marriage usually have an easier time showing the court that they are in a committed intimate relationship. For instance, if you and your partner had children together, purchased a home together, opened joint bank accounts, or created estate planning documents together, these actions would support the existence of a committed intimate relationship.

Child Custody Rights in a Committed Intimate Relationship

For the most part, parents in committed intimate relationships who are breaking up and going their separate ways can expect to handle child custody determinations just as parents going through a divorce would address these matters. The parties can work together to establish a parenting plan, which includes details about with whom the child will reside and for how long, with whom the child will spend the holidays, how decisions about the child’s education or healthcare will be made, among many other considerations. If the separation is between the child’s unmarried parents, the process will be similar to a case where the parents were married and seeking a divorce. However, if the parties in the committed intimate relationship included only one biological parent, the other party may encounter more difficulties when attempting to establish custodial rights. If you are not the child’s biological parent and you wish to claim parental responsibility or custodial rights, you will need to discuss your options with a highly qualified and experienced Seattle family law attorney who can help you identify the most strategic course of action.

Key Factors That Washington Courts Consider in Committed Intimate Relationship Child Custody Cases

If the ending of a committed intimate relationship is between the child’s biological parents, then the process for establishing a parenting plan is virtually the same as it would be for married couples going through a divorce. The parties will work together to create a parenting plan that prioritizes the child’s best interests and file it with the court for its approval. If the parties cannot agree to the terms of the parenting plan, they can take the matter to mediation, arbitration, or litigation to finalize the parenting plan. 

However, if the child custody or parenting plan negotiations are between one biological parent and a non-biological parent, there are additional considerations that must be addressed. For instance, the child’s other biological parents may still have legal rights, and their wishes may influence these decisions. Non-biological parents or adoptive parents who wish to retain child custody or visitation rights can file a Petition for De Facto Parentage to prove to the court that these rights should be legally recognized. Every child custody case is different, so the court will examine the specific details of every situation to determine the most equitable option that protects the child’s best interests. If you have any questions about legal custody for parents in committed intimate relationships or establishing parenting rights after a breakup in Washington state, consider discussing these concerns with a trusted and experienced Seattle family law attorney who can help you understand your legal rights and options.

Frequently Asked Questions About Committed Intimate Relationships in Washington State

Understanding your child custody rights in a committed intimate relationship can take some time, especially if you are not the child’s biological parent. As you begin to explore your options for ending your committed intimate relationship in the greater Seattle area, it’s natural that several questions will arise along the way. Below are just a few of the most frequently asked questions (FAQs) about child custody laws for unmarried couples in Washington to get you started.

What is the Legal Definition of a Committed Intimate Relationship?

Under RCW 26.60.010, Washington recognizes the value of Washington residents who “are in intimate, committed, and exclusive relationships with another person to whom they are not legally married.” When the court is determining whether a committed intimate relationship existed, it will use many factors to reach its decision, such as the continuity of cohabitation, the duration of the relationship, the purpose of the relationship, whether the parties pooled their resources and services for joint projects, the intent of the parties, and other relevant factors. 

Can Committed Intimate Relationship Custody Disputes Involve Mediation?

Yes. Mediation is a form of alternative dispute resolution (ADR) that encourages the parties to collaborate in a clear and respectful manner in order to reach a shared goal. Unlike a traditional courtroom where a judge oversees the case and determines the outcome, mediation takes place in a less formal setting and with the guidance of a neutral third party. The mediator does not take sides or decide the outcome—instead, they serve as a facilitator who encourages the parties to work together to arrive at a mutually acceptable solution.

Get Started With Seattle’s Go-To Family Law Firm Today

If you are struggling with a child custody matter, you deserve to work with a dedicated and experienced legal advocate who treats you with the care and empathy you need during this challenging time. At the Hemmat Law Group, we are committed to serving every client with compassion as we identify the most effective approach to helping you achieve your desired outcome. Please contact our Seattle office today at (206) 682-5200 to get started.